Only Me and My Wife(Conflict of a Geek).........

We have some issues that we just cannot resolve. They are issues that most would never encounter but in the Foulks House it is everyday. Here are the five things that we encounter that no one else deals with counting down to the most the frequent issue....

5. She doesn't want our lives to be a remake of "Revenge of the Nerds."

4. We have more CRT monitors sitting on the front porch that we do TVs and they have been there for months.

3. That while in the house I still use the iPhone to check mail and browse web sites. My Viao is normally three feet away.

2. Cutting a hole in the bathroom wall to have a slide out laptop stand that includes an IBM Thinkpad. Every one should have one if you ask me.

1. Wanting to name my firstborn son Linux. This tends to go bad when I bring it up!:)

Blessed!

My plans were to post on Friday. I have given up on blogging everyday for now and am content with blogging a couple of times a week. I was planning to post on Friday but due to the fact that I am now a Dad that is least of priorities. I am going tp e taking a short(2 days to 2 weeks) break on post. This is due to a need to of being a new dad.My daughter was born on Feb. 14, 08 at 8:51 pm . Get this. She weighted 10lbs 12 oz and was 20 inches long! One big baby! So don't think that I have gone awol. Just taking a few days off to realize my blessing@

Should Christian Couples Have Children?Swap Blog

When I was writing the last post it reminded me of a post I read at a better blog. Yes, yes Swap Blog. 99.9% of the blogs out there are composed of better writers, thinkers, and story tellers than I could be. Anyway here is a segment of the post they posted awhile back. I suggest you finish reading this one....

Marriage and kids

Are Christian couples compelled by God to have children? That question seems to arise a lot in today’s world, so what are the feelings of the Christian blogosphere on this?

God ordained marriage to be between a man and a woman, honesty hurts sometimes people. He also ordained marriage to be a means of procreation........(more)

Soon to be.

In a short amount of time my life will change. The first major change in a man's life come with the unity of marriage. The males world goes upside down and inside out. All of our priorities change. We go from watching Sports Center to listening to Rachael Ray cook eggs benedict 24 different ways. We go from being able to stay u all night playing xbox to staying up and watching lifetime.
More importantly we go to not caring so much about the xbox or Sports Center. We start to care about different aspects of our life. We want to get our lives in order. We cannot do that if we are up all night dominating Madden. It just can't coexsist. We have new proritys. Then once we feel like we are begining to take control of the new phase of life....We have kids!
When I think about kids I think about panic, money, schools, do I have enough space, can they come out potty trained, how did this happen, what am I going to do!?!?! It can be frustrating. These are what I thought when I found out I was to be a dad. Now it is getting closer and I cannot help but to wonder. Why worry? This is going to happen. How much distrust in God do I show by not displaying my faith in Him to provide. Yeah me and my wife are young. Yeah we had a five year plan for children. Yeah it wasn't meant to go down like this. Well it is though. No more five year plan. No extended time to prepare for all this finacally. No way out. Stiaght forward and faith we must approach this. God is in complete control. I know this. Now I must show this.
We look for foward to the birth of Annalise Elizabeth! We know that God made big plans for all of us. No matter what our size or age, have a part in God's everlasting plan. The works of God extend beyond the molten rock, the trees, the sky, and the stars. They extend to all of us. We are the works of God! His most treasured works! So a child birth should never bring concern. It should always be a great thing. When a child is born every dad is proud of what they "made"! Do you think that God is any different! Our loving heavenly Father rejoices in child birth! No you won't find that in those words in scripture. Maybe it is some more of my bad theology. I don't think so.
Soon to be. A work of God is about to be revealed in my life. I get to watch this work come into the world. I am excited and blessed for the opportunity that God has given me.

Surprise Post....

What a night last night was. The rehearsal, the dinner, meeting the family members on her side that I had never even heard of. Then the "bachelor Party" which was a blast(and was safe for young children, no dancing women or any of that mess).
We chose the Holiday Inn to crash at because of the 24 hour pool. There was an issue where they tried to tell us it was closed but was later reopened for us by management(or a refund was needed.We called before we came and was told the pool is open and is always open to the guest of the establishment. We were never told it was under construction and closed. It was having concrete work down about 20 feet away from it). We had a blast. The highlight had be four guys who had never played racket(probably not spelled right) ball before playing with their own rules(It was dodge ball for us).
we enjoyed the 10x10 fitness center and even thought about playing Super Mario Brothers at an unbelievable 6.95 per hour(for Mario?). However don't think I am complaining. We all were able to relax and have a good time. Yeah this post really has no point other than my collecting thoughts and helping to ensure that I preserve the memories.
We managed to sleep around 6 a.m. and had to get up at 6:30 a.m.. I had to head of to Gatlinburg to get the cabin keys, Mike needed to go and get a hair cut and Everette had to go play in a Football Game. Ever seen Varsity Blues? Remember the part where they stumbled out of the bar and got rocked by the other team? Yeah the only missing was AC/DC playing Thunderstruck. 26 to 7 the opponents way. He will be okay though. He is now sleeping. Mike suggest that I chug Red Bull on the way up and sip one on the way back. Does that stuff work for any body out there? All it did for me was have me make an extra stop at a C-Store and twitch a little(lack of sleep may be the culprit in the twitching though.
All in all I am really looking forward the ring that will be locked on my finger but more important to me is the woman who will give me the ring. Even with my eyes needing an entire bottle of Clear Eyes I see that today will be a great day. Our fellowship with God will be joined and we will be able to worship Him on a whole other level. Wow! How great is our God guys and gals? He points us where should go and when we move in that direction we are overwhelmed with he beauty of His work. I looked to the clouds when we left the motel this morning and I say pink clouds and then I looked up a little later and the sky above was a gradient blue with pink showing in the sun's spot in the sky. The clouds now were a brilliant purple. The with such a slow, graceful pace that you knew that God was there. Just one of those moments we have were we can say I feel God's hug! I am surrounded by love. Wow.
Please be kind with the comments on typos for this post. I really want to get to bed and am not proof reading or spell checking at all.

Fight Fair-(from premarial counseling)

Okay so last night was the last session of counseling for me and my soon to be wife. We covered three subjects and instead of putting both into one post why not spread it out. The topics that were presented to us were fighting, right thinking, and sex. Well you can look at the topics and see why they would each need to be discussed. So for now we are going to do fair fighting.
What does it mean to fight fair? You hear this boxing and growing up may have heard it a little in school. So what does it mean to fight fair with your wife/husband? I means to fight for today. A fair fight is not a fight with things that happened yesterday, last week, last year, or anytime besides today. Alot of people have a mental set post-its and when ever something is said or done they will mark it down ad store it for later. We fill up the gun with has many bullets we can fit into it before the big fight. Why? We are asking for a big big fight.
When you husband or wife does something that is not all that likable to you(and they will) you have to address it that day or let it go. Now that doesn't mean that you have to fight in the middle of a restaurant. That means you should look them and say,"I know you love me but what you just said really hurt my feelings. When we go home we should talk about this."
It is not that hard to do. Most of the time it is habit to hold in our thoughts of how we feel. For us guys it is even tougher. We are suppose to be macho men! We have to realize that our women see us as their big softies. We should feel up that roll. Now don't worry guys they also see us as their rocks, protectors, and all that other strong guy stuff. They want you to be able to tell them what is bothering you and not do it in three weeks over her not filling up the gas tank. Women the huffing and puffing for two days doesn't help. We need to know what is going on with you. You have to let us when we hurt you. Don't get in front of us during Saturday's game and remind us of all our failed attempts to start home projects and then our personal faults.
Fighting should be fair and that means for us to fight about an event that happened today and not any other day. Let the bullets go. Your fights will be over a lot faster. There are tons of books on healthy fights. Go and read one some time. It will really help your marriage.

Fulfillment- (Premarital Counseling)

Don't you love that your wife or husband is the part that completes you. She or he makes you feel fulfilled. Right? Wrong my friend! You spouse cannot fulfill no more than you can fulfill yourself. Like when you go out and by stuff but you still need more stuff so you keep on buying and buying. It will never end. You cannot be satisfied. You will always want more than yo have. It is the same way with you wife our husband.
Lets break it down. Men your wife is going to fail you. She is going to disappoint you. Dinner may be bad one night, the house a wreck, the clothes not folded, or she may actually lie to you. Ladies your husband is going to want to watch the game while you are cleaning, he will fall asleep on you new couch with in a week, his socks will not be turned right side out when you go to wash them, and you know what...? We will forget on of those holiday's that you think we should be able to recite in our sleep(friendly joke, we should know those dates).
Here is my point. you are going to let each other down alot. If it is fulfillment you are looking for you should not hold you breath. Fir you will turn blue and pass out. Fulfillment is not deserved. We are deserving of hell because of our sins. God never sad that we should live a life of complete enjoyment.We are told of hardship and trials. If you want fulfillment you better find Jesus. Because no person, place,or thing will give it to you ever. People are not fulfilling.Only Jesus is.

Should women be submissive?(From premarital counseling)

Colossians 3:18-Married women, be submissive to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. (WEY version)
Alot of women see this and they begin to cringe at what they think it means. Mean who are little boys take this scripture as giving them power of their wives. Our society has built the word submissive up to be this horrible word. The world views it as a bad thing.
Some husbands think it means they have this control and their wives should cook, clean, have dinner ready for them, and watch the children even after they are home. They see it has the woman being the less important or valued partner in the relationship. This is wrong and it is where we men have fallen short.
Yes the Bible tells us that woman should submit to us but it also tells us what we should be. We should be men of God, making wise choices in all aspects, fighters to survive and provide for our families, we should also be men that our wives love to follow and trust to make good choices.
Just because we are to be the ruler of the house doesn't mean that we are to be dictators. We should hear the opinion of our wives and take what they say into consideration. If it is the best choice to make then we should go with it. That is what we are missing. We are trying to be leaders who won't learn.
Our decision in our homes should be ours. Ultimately ours alone. That is not saying that if you wife has a better idea we shouldn't go with it but we should make the choice to go with it. That is called making the choices and making them wisely.
Now women don't think I am saying you should be slaves. Not at all. You are created by God for God. You are valued. It is a sad thing to know that so many men have lead you to believe that being submissive is being a slave. Thats not it. You role as being submissive is to all your husband to make the final choice. To stand by him and help him along the way. Your role is not to slave, have children, and then answer to him. You should be cherished. You would have no problem being submissive to someone who wants the best for you and your family. Some one who will lay down their life for you and fight to keep you by their side. I am so sorry that so few of you have seen this in a man. It was not intended to be this.
It is my prayer that we learn that our marriage is no complete and will not last with out seeing each other as important and not a lesser person. We are all created in God's image. We should treat each other with the same care we would want God to give us. By these "men" being sexist you have been robbed.
You task it has stated above. Stand by your man. Let him lead you. Trust him to care for you. Before you are married you should ask your self. Can I be submissive to this man? IS this the direction I want to go? Were is he wanting to lead me?
These are important. To be submissive you must trust, love, commit, and understand why you are being submissive. It is because you have on caring for you who will take the blame for the mistakes and yet fight to take away what caused it.
Being submissive is letting you husband lead you into battle, into the future, and into all things you will ever face. I hope you have a great leader and one you can learn what really being submissive is. It should not be feared but desired.

Love is not enough.

Why is love not enough to hold a marriage together? I know, I know some of you die hard kids are out there reading this saying that love is enough. I would have said that to until at my meeting tonight that my Pastor told me and my girlfriend that love was not enough, kids are not enough, money is not enough, and looks are not enough.
Lets start with looks. Looks change. You don't know what your husband or wife will look like in 10,15, or 20 years. Not only that but has much has we shouldn't say this....You can always find some one who you think is prettier. Yeah thats true. If you are with someone over time you begin to forget why you were so attracted to them. Looks change and you perception of how people look changes.
Money is not enough. Money comes and goes. You have ups and downs. Some people split up because they have too much money. Some split up because they don't have enough. Money has been proven top be one of the biggest reasons for a divorce.
Are kids enough? No not in anyway. How many time have you heard it said,"If not for the kids I would leave him/her!"? I know of one of my friends that says it all the time. If kids were enough then people wouldn't say that, because they wouldn't think that. Once the kids leave the nest or another nest for you all comes along it will be the end of the marriage.
Lastly is love. Lets be blunt. Love from us is simply a feeling. Feelings do not keep a marriage together. If you don't love each other so what(another thing the pastor said)? It doesn't matter. feelings come and go.
Your marriage is a commitment. You both said till death. If you fall out of love that does not change your commitment to each other. It means you should work harder to find out how to complete your commitment. Never give up.
50% percent of marriages in the Baptist church ends in divorce. That means half of the people that God blessed gave up on that blessing(your husband/wife) when they were tired of it. I am at a loss for words. We have to do better to stop trying to rip apart what God has for us and to let it all work together. Bottom line people, If you say I do. Mean it. If not then never say it.

Pre-marriage meetings start tomorrow

What is the point? I don't know. All I can tell you I know is that it will save me about 50 bucks. So that is a good thing.
Now these are assumptions of what the meetings may be. I think it might be so that you can review what is about to happen and make sure that you both are ready for the wedding to go on. In this case I favor the meetings big time.
Did you know that the average marriage last a whole 7 years on average now and days? That is sad so any type of clarification as to the entire marriage and the for life answer that you will have to give is good.
Why shouldn't we be challenged to ensure that the choice we are planning to make is the one we really want to make and not a just a gust of courage.
Most engagements now and days are short. Which if I remember the right numbers they last less than six months then the wedding takes place. Now here is where I am going with that said.
Short engagements have equaled shorter marriages when you look at the numbers. If most people are going to rush into a wedding then there needs to be that small (if not large) event in between n which they have to sit down in a room with a certified clergy ( preferably the one doing the service)and have time to think about it and let it sit in. Maybe this should be a law to any one under the age of 24. I would go for it and I am 23. The marriages today are short lived in most cases and that is very very wrong.

Alibi Network

“If you go stray, why not get away with it?…. Your partner will be spared hurt…..Keeping your affair discreet,keeping your marriage alive.”
It is a cover up for those who wish to cheat. This company,The Alibi Network in Illinois,really helps people cheat. It starts at $75.00 for a temporary untraceable number to a “full-cover alibi.”
They provide people with a fake hotel reservation, fake airplane itinerary,fake hotel answering service,fake work seminars,fake seminar schedules,fake seminar registrations and optional fake certificates of seminar completion.
Company executives say this…”It is a healthy deception-if you care enough to craft an expensive alibi,the logic goes, you must have some tender feeling for the deceived.If there was no demand we would have no company.We didn’t invent lying.We didn’t invent infidelity.We just found a niche in the existing market.”
Well first off it is not a market. It is cheating and it is not right at any time for any reason.Cashing in on peoples infidelity makes you have the sin on your hands. You are lying to people and destroying lives.You have made it more acceptable now than ever. This is what we have come to. We now have a company that helps people lie and get away with cheating.This is completely unacceptable to me and I know that my Bible says that it is unacceptable.
Hotel-$55 a night
Alibi-$75
Infidelity-Unacceptable